Dogs 2012

ABSCENCE MAKES THE HEART
(12/6/12)


life
has come
down
to a continual
search
for gaps
of space
and time
in which
to rest

in which
to remain
sane

a few minutes
in the garage
each morning
to sit
in the car
and breathe freely
before it all
begins

constantly
attempting
to improve
my position
in traffic

not
to make time

but to make
some open road
in front of
and beside
me

hopefully
to establish
an accident free

a people free
buffer

at work
I arrive early
in order to ease
into the day
alone
and to
catch up
on things undone
before the phones
ring
the emails
fly
and the coworkers
prattle
away

I eat
at my desk
while others
go out to lunch
just to recapture
some serenity
lost
in the morning's
activity

at
the end
of the day
I'm the last
in the office

slowing
my pulse
in the stillness
before
departing

first thing
home
I exercise
in solitude
inside a room
filled with
loud music
and darkness
to soothe
the stress
from the
day

finally
in bed
my wife asleep
I read for awhile
then put
the book away
to just
lie there

lights off

house
quiet

nothing
or no one
grabbing to get
at me

I feel
at peace

an integral
part
of the universe

without
these minor
respites
I would be
a miserable
human being

I would
hate
the world

hate
you

hate
myself

nature
may abhor
a vacuum

but I
am addicted
to my tiny
personal pockets
of emptiness

in those
scattered moments
I am kept
a free
man