A Poemdog

Dogs 2011

BEST ACTOR
(9/21/11)


"go out
and play!"

they'd say
looking down
at me
encamped
in front
of the TV

I would
gauge
their energy
for an argument
then
more often
than not
stay put
in silence

heads shaking
they'd walk
away

these people
who thought
they were
my parents

comedies
dramas
news
weather
sports

I needed
to study
people's actions
reactions
emotions
then emulate
them
so that I wouldn't
seem such
an outsider

I was
programming
myself
with network
programming

when finally
forced
to go outside
I would practice
what I had seen
on the other
children
knowing
that if I could
fool them
the adults
wouldn't
be a problem

television
allowed me
to suffer through
schools
jobs
relationships
social situations
with a modicum
of believability

every once
in a while
I would revert
to form
with some
non sequitur
or gesture
not quite
acceptable

realizing
my mistake
I would gloss
it over
with a quick
laugh
slap
on the back
handshake
or hug
to let them
know
that I was still
one
of them

decades
gone
these slips
are now considered
eccentricities

"that's
just the way
he is
sometimes"

I'm not
sure
what they'll think
when all acting
is atrophied
and the man
they have known
through the years
becomes the creature
they have not

wait

I've seen
that movie

"he's quite
mad"

they'll say

the end