Dogs 2010

CRAWL
(11/2/10)


most days
I look out
at the world
through eyes
at least
20 years
younger

today
however
I feel
well over
the 51
marked
by the calendar

head
back
hip
ankle
aching
sore
pinching
just plain
bent

I limp
and wince
wondering
where my youth
has gone
and if
it will
return

I know
that dragging
my middle aged
ass
through the
daily routine
beats the hell
out of the predicament
of oh so many
surrounding
suffering people

but
I can't
see them now
and don't
figure them into
my factor
of fatigue

my focus
has been reduced
to this fog
of futility
in front
of me

I wish
to hide
in a warm
dark room
away from humans
and their
humanity

instead
I'll zombie walk
down the brightly lit
air conditioned
Muzak filled
hallway
for another
cup of
coffee
with which
to wash down
another tablet
or two
of ibuprofen

I wish
to be
humorous
and glib
but the grind
has taken me
this morning
to a land
of laconic
lassitude

perhaps
lunch
will offer
some opportunity
for improvement

I can always
start over
this afternoon

that
or stab
the next person
gracing my face
through the heart
with a
letter opener

now that thought
makes me
smile
just a little
again

there is
hope