Dogs 2005

LOWER POWER
(10/9/05)


as the
program promised
I have apparently recovered
from a hopeless state
of mind and body
or at least
these days
I no longer feel
hopeless
about both
of them
at the same
time

so what now?

I have been restored
to a relative sanity
but my sane self
has yet to come
fully face to face
with that god
of my limited
understanding
that should fill
the days of my life
since there are still
admittedly times
when I feel
very alone
in a sober
world

that was both
the beautiful
and horrible advantage
about my insanity

it clogged
the world
completely
with my
sick self
to the point
where nothing else
seemed to be lacking
or necessary

I know
that I need
to find a higher power
in every moment today
but on most days
I would prefer
that necessary force
to be a bit farther down
and on a more
equal level

a presence
say
whose breath
I could feel
on my face
as my name
was again
whispered
with desire